The following is an excerpt from a post by Dan Rockwell at "Leadership Freak." I started following Dan on twitter about two weeks ago and he has to be one of the foremost experts on leadership. His tweets are incredible and if you aren't already you should follow him at: www.twitter.com/leadershipfreak
His post talked about how even honest leaders could lose the respect of those that follow. Here is what he had to say:
When you lose trust by making people feel disrespected, people give themselves permission to question your character and motives. Honesty is not the issue.
You can be honest and lose trust.
Not only do they judge your character, they feel justified, even compelled, to “warn” others about you. You can’t be trusted.
People trust you when they feel respected by you.
When they feel disrespected, however, they are disrespected. Perception is reality.
10 Behaviors that help people feel disrespected
1.Rushed exchanges. You don’t have time for them.
2.Unilateral decisions. Lack of participation in decisions that directly impact them.
3.Poor listening. They don’t feel understood.
6.Emphasizing failure as a tool to motivate forward momentum.
8.Cutting them off when they’re speaking.
10. Watching your computer while talking.
10 ways to show respect:
1.The opposites of the list above.
3.Gently, clearly tell it like it is, even when they disagree.
4.Appreciate their skills and talents.
6.Admire their contribution and accomplishments.
8.Use their title.
9.Acknowledge their challenges and struggles.
10. Hold phone calls and other communications while they’re speaking.
Read the entire post at: http://bit.ly/o3PBXR (and check out the rest of his post while you are there -- it will be worth the time.